A couple local job openings to mention

First, there's the position of Utah Highway Patrol DUI Enforcement Team Commander. It seems Lt. Fred Swain, the current holder of that position and a 15 year veteran of the UHP, destroyed his cruiser while driving drunk last week! He caused a big enough accident to make it impossible for any of the professional courtesy winks and warnings to keep him out of trouble.

Without a doubt, there will be a job opening in the UHP very soon.

Next, there is a City Manager position open in Riverton, since the last guy, Mark Cram has resigned after getting caught trying to sneak a peak at teenaged girls in a tanning salon. I'm pretty certain he's already pleaded guilty to avoid going to court and having even more of his kinky behaviour dragged through the public eye.

Consider for a moment why any straight, 50 year old white guy would visit a tanning salon in Utah, in June. Let's be honest, if the guy wanted to get a tan, he could mow his own yard, handwash his car or take the boat to the lake, so getting a tan was not this guy's intent! No, dammit, he's a pervert! Doesn't this guy know about the internet? Let's face it, finding naked girls, even in tanning booths, is pretty darn simple on the internet and you can keep your job if you don't go looking for them on your computer at work.

So we have some job openings here behind the Zion Curtain, get your resumes in early if you are interested in either position. You know, here at Wasted Electrons, there is a special name that I use for characters like these two, you might remember it-
Mormon, no, that's not it. Latter Day Saint? Nope, not that either, its DUMBASS! That's right its a toss up for dumbass of the week here on the Wasatch front.